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February 07, 2008


As a college student in the midst of a faddish, dog-eat-dog culture, it is difficult yet inevitable to think about the future. Sure, I have dreams. I have expectations of how my life and the world should ideally evolve, but the influences that shape my life, whether media, family, school, or church, seem to continually suggest diverse ideas of what is a “satisfactory life” or “perfect world”. What I actually wish life to become is the important question. Where do I see myself and the world in the year 2033?

In the context of the Christian Worldview, to which I hope to cling tight to the rest of my days, I feel that my life is presently under the “Fall”, waiting to be redeemed. Sure, I am technically redeemed by the blood of Christ, but more abstractly, my life has revolted from a peaceful acceptance of my parents’ worldviews to turmoil and ‘rebellion’, if you will. In this surreal median life between childhood and “the real world”, I have taken a step back from what I once believed in, on the verge of unbelief and mistrust of the church and what exactly reality is. I feel, though, that this mistrust is more of an evaluation, and that through this, God is beginning to redeem my life to be all He intended it to be. In twenty-five years, I expect to be a wife, as I am presently engaged to be married to a fantastic man on May 31, 2008. We want to adopt children and live as completely pleasing to God as humanly possible the rest of our lives. I expect to not have everything figured out, but to keep learning and growing in my worldview and knowledge of the truth about the world.

I hope that the world settles down more in the next twenty-five years. My generation is so disposable, self-centered, and complacent. I hope that in upcoming generations, people care more. I feel that people in this world will do whatever it takes to profit in life, even if they are the cause of others’ misfortunes. I figure that if people care more, though depravity will remain, at least it will be more livable.

I started listening to Dashboard Confessional randomly tonight, and found it to be inspiring music. The Shade of Poison Trees and The Widow's Peak are probably my favorite song so far. They makes my thoughts flow.

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